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Halloween Tomfoolery

If you hadn’t already guessed it’s Halloween tomorrow. It’s all about the costumes, the pumpkin carving the sweets and of course trick or treating. More to the point this year, whether or not you can actually trick or treat! 

Cue the 5000000 post by mums in the same fucking mum group asking the same fucking question - so who is trick or treating tomorrow?? And cue massive eye roll from me! Firstly I’m under the impression that having lots of kids knocking on your door probably isn’t the most hygienic thing to be doing right now, just a thought. Secondly there is a god damn search function in these groups so why the bloody hell don’t people just use it?!? Seeing the same, quite frankly, annoying question being asked over and over again really starts to get on ones tits after a while. 

For WEEKS there have been posts flying around regarding an alternative to trick or treating, the pumpkin and decoration trails. I mean some days it is the only bastard thing I see on my news feed. That can’t just be my news feed can it? I understand we see different shit but I’m going to go out on a limb here and say if you’ve got kids some cunt in your phone has pushed untold Halloween ideas into your eye line.

Why are people soooooooooo desperate to knock on strangers doors? I find the whole concept rather strange but you know my kids want to do it so the last couple of years we have. I also suppose that for some they love seeing the kids dressed up and getting involved in the Halloween spirit and I like that, I love community. However I don’t get this outrage that it’s not really a cool idea this year. Like people are seriously pissed off! Maybe it’s the culmination of events this shit show of a year has thrown at us that have got people all worked up and hey you know that’s understandable. However part of me, and the feeling I get from some people and some posts, is that they are so fucking entitled that they can’t believe they are not ALLOWED to do it. 

Please can we get a hold of ourselves. Please can we remind ourselves that soooo much shit has gone down this year, death, people loosing their jobs, their homes, loosing everything. Kids not able to fucking eat one hot meal,  just calm down about a holiday that is really just some commercial bullshit we have adopted from America. More plastic shit floating around. More costumes in landfill. Kids off their tits on sugar. I realise I may be coming across like a total bitch but I’m just trying to have a bit of perspective! 

Rather than focus on the things we can’t do why don’t we look at the things we can do. Carve pumpkins together and teach your smalls about spreading the insides outside for the animals to feast. Bake a pumpkin pie or make spiced pumpkin soup. Go for a creepy walk with lanterns or fake candles in your carved pumpkins. Stay inside and play games for your sweets or do a treasure hunt indoors or outdoors. Paint leaves, watch a film with hot chocolate and marshmallows.

If this year has truly taught me anything it’s that what truly matters is time, feelings, being present and in the moment. Loved ones, good company, learning new things and experiences. It’s about smiling and laughing with people you love and being lucky enough to feed my family. 

I know trick or treating is an “experience” but why not make a new experience, a new tradition something for you and yours that your kids will do with them and theirs. 

Please stop asking on Facebook if anyone is trick or treating because really you should know the fucking answer and it’s seriously annoying! 

Rant over!!! 

I hope you enjoy Halloween, I honestly do I’m really not that cunty but sometimes you just got to tell people to USE THE FUCKING SEARCH FUNCTION, thanks.

Mwah x 


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